February 25, 2012

My Birth Story

We found out that we were going to be parents to antother about a week after our wedding. It came as a shock to both Jared and I as we had planned to wait until the summer to start trying to avoid the baby being born around the holidays. When we found out we were pregnant, I was a little hesitant and Jared was actually a bit more excited than me. Not, that I didn't want a baby but so many things had come to my mind. I was worried how Sophie would handle being a big sister and no longer the baby of the family. I worried how I as a mother would handle being a parent to two (two and under). I can honestly say that it took me awhile to accept the pregnancy.

The pregnancy it self was night and day from Sophie. With Sophie, I was constantly puking all the time. With Violet's pregnancy I felt nauseous for one week and NEVER threw up..not even once. There were some days that I forgot I was pregnant. For this reason I thought we were having a boy. In all honesty I (like most parents) didn't care what I had. It would be nice to have a boy because we didn't have one, and it would be nice to have a girl because I loved it the first time around. I told everyone around me that I thought it was a boy (and I really did) but towards the finding out day I secretly hoped for another girl. I was hoping to have two little girls so close in age that they could develop that sisterly bond. Jared had already admitted he wanted another girl...so when we found out our beautiful Violet was indeed a girl..we were exstatic.

Towards the end of my pregnancy, we started to notice little miss Violet has still head up..and comfortable. We tried everything to turn her..including an attempted ECV..which failed. The doctor simply put that my bicornuate uterus was too small for her to turn head down...we scheduled the C-Section. I was completely devastated about the c-section. I loved my birth with Sophie and wanted to have another beautiful story to tell Violet someday. I went into a little depression over the last couple weeks before she arrived as I realized she was indeed not turning head down. Her C-Section was planned for January 20th, 2012.

A couple days before her C-Section a huge snow storn came to town. We rarely get snow storms so it was a bit exciting for everyone. There was so much snow that some trees had started to fall down and rip power lines down. Less than 24 hours before my C-Section I recieved the phone call that it had been canceled. It had been re-scheduled for Janaury 23rd, 2012 instead, which was coincidently my late nana's birthday. :)

January 23rd, 2012 I woke up with the weirdest feeling. I was going to have a baby. I had no contractions and felt great so it weirded me out that fairly soon a baby would be here. We had all of our things packed and decided to go ver to my parents house to pass the time away. I had a final due that week so I figured I would get that out of the way. I really didn't want to think about what was going to happen to me shortly. I was excited to meet Violet..but dreading the surgery. At last it was time!

We got to the hospital and I had no idea what to expect. They took me to a room and hooked up an IV line. I got dressed into a hospital gown and awaited my fate. A nurse came in and reviewed my chart. Asked me if I was still having a tubal...!@#@#$! I was NOT having a tubal and when I heard that, I almost walked out of the hospital. They then informed me that my Dr. had bailed on me at the last minute and I was stuck with a Dr. I wasn't too fond of. 20 minutes later the nurse came to get me and I was walking down the hall to the OR. That was seriously a very long walk..it really stressed me out. The hardest part was letting go of Jared's hand. I didn't want to leave him..I didn't want to face the spinal without him. The OR room was intimidating. tons of instruments everywhere and a good handful of people. I had a nice anethesiologist who explained everything to me (even though I didn't want to know). After the spinal was in, Jared got to come back into the room. I was so happy he was there with me. He made me feel so much better. I Love him :)He made jokes and kept me preoccupied as we awaited the cry of our Violet. About 20 minutes at 3:41pm we heard her cry...and it was so beautiful. They cleaned her up and Jared took pictured of her..and finally he brought her to me. It was so hard seeing my baby but not being able to hold her...but I tried to be strong. They tried to get Jared to leave when she left but I wouldnt let him..he had to be there with me.

After they finished up, we went to the recovery room to be with my baby Violet and my mother who was watching her while we finished up. I was feeling horrible at this point and shaking like crazy but once I saw Violet it made everything better. We immediately nursed for the first time and I fell in love.

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