December 4, 2010


... I want to divulge all my secret onto here, but then I realize this is not a diary this is a blog. People do not always use your information for the good and sometimes things are spread out into the world with negativity. So I will never name names nor will I make it obvious as to whom I may be talking about. Names are like a copyright...


To start out I am not having the greatest of days. I have been arguing all day with He who shall not be named lol, and I am at my low point. Fighting is not something we do often but today was one of those days. It has been argued numerous times about the object of lying and wether or not it is helpful in a relationship. Trust's not. For future reference (to he who shall not be named) when you lie to me even over the smallest of things I feel like a tiny speck of dirt on your shoe. What hurts the most is when I try to discuss how I feel with you and you step all over my feelings as if they are the other piece of dirt on your other shoe. My intentions were good and it hurt ot think you would take me as the kind of person who would do that to you without telling why didn't you trust me? Have I not shown you in the past that I can be trusted? I'm still here aren't I? So now we are at a crossroads. The how to trust each other crossroads. (No infidelity was involved). A lot of hurtful things were said and now we are at one of those places where talking does no good.

Second reason as to why I am having a very crappy day

I feel very offended by a certain group of people. I never quite realized how many people were unaware of something I am about to explain... Sophie was NO accident. Jared and I both knew what we were doing and she was planned. I am not a homewrecker and I never forced anyone to have a child with me. Before statements like "You cousin just did the same damn thing..he got his gf knocked up to and now he has to marry her also" are made you should consider the feelings involved. Sit back and consider for second.. "Why would people go out of their way for you when you have never done the same."

So in conclusion:

Today was not a good day. Yet, hopefully, it will get better and soon I will find some piece to this maddnes..

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